Remember
by ShadowSoulN7
Summary: Fenris and Hawke go back farther then he remembers, but Hawke herself doesn't know who he really is. In the end, they both recall, they both remember, they both know. *Rated M for later chapters.
1. Tevinter

**A/N: I have decided to go ahead and write this fic (it's been in my head for a while, but I was debating on writing it or not.) A bit of the DA2 stuff, well, I've decided to ignore it (mainly stuff about Hawke not knowing about Hadriana, Danarius, Tevinter, the magisters, etc.) but I guess it's also replacing, since I'm adding some story. Either way, I hope you enjoy.**

**Pairing: Mage!LadyHawkeXFenris (and YoungMage!LadyHawkeXLeto)**

**Concept: Hawke travels to Tevinter with her father when she is only 12 years old. She ends up meeting Hadriana, Danarius and many others, but also falling in love with an elven slave by the name of Leto.**

**After years and she is now in Kirkwall, she is running side-by-side with an ex-slave, of the same magister, named Fenris. Something seems familiar about him, and she wonders if he knew Leto, but he doesn't recall. She cannot put the pieces together, not even after yelling at Hadriana to tell her, but after seeing Varania again, she knows where, and who, Leto is...that he is the elf, she has had by her side for years now, and the elf that she loves...**

-x-x-x-

Emily Hawke was so used to hiding her powers as an apostate, yet here in Tevinter, she didn't have to, but the people seemed scared.

Her father, Malcome, walked ahead of her, his staff clicking against the ground with each step. He was a tall man, with short brown hair and golden eyes. He was kind, caring, loving, protective, proud, and she admired him for those reasons and more.

She smiled and looked around the markets, merchants had fear in their eyes as she and her father passed, they did not call out to them, they simply hid.

Emily was pulled from her thoughts when she hit the ground, her staff snapping.

"Crap." she muttered.

"I'm sorry, mistress." a male elf apologized. He extended a hand to her and she took it, getting to her feet.

"It's fine," she assured, brushing the dirt from her gown. "I should have paid attention to where I was going. I should be the one saying sorry."

"Are you alright, Em?" her father asked, coming over.

"Fine," she said then looked at the elf. There was fear in his moss green eyes. Her father bent to pick up her staff.

"Looks like you'll need a new one," Malcome sighed. "Well, I know where to get one."

"Leto!" a voice snapped. "What did you do now, boy?" A young girl appeared, clutching a staff.

"I-I knocked her down, it was an accident mistress, I promi-" the elf began but the girl smacked him.

"Watch where your going, you fool!" she spat then turned to Emily. "The slave didn't hurt you, did he?"

"No, I'm the one to blame if anybody. Only thing broken is my staff, and it was almost broken in the first place." Emily shrugged.

"I am sure lord Danarius could spare one for you, since this stupid elf broke it." the girl said. "Oh, I'm Hadriana, an apprentice to lord Danarius."

"I'm Emily," Emily smiled slightly. "As for the staff, I have coin, it's fine." she paused and turned to Leto. "I am sorry for not paying attention, messere."

He was silent and Hadriana smacked him again.

"Answer her!" she ordered.

"Damn magisters," Malcome muttered. "Make all us mages look bad."

Hadriana sighed.

"Do not apologize to this slave, serah, it is his fault, and he will be punished. Now, I insist you come and let me get you a new staff." she said.

"I will come, but you mustn't punish him, I told you, it was my fault." Emily argued. "I do not want him to be punished for something I did."

"That is for lord Danarius to decide." Hadriana concluded, turning to leave. "Come, slave." she ordered. Leto fallowed her and Emily fell in step beside him, her father sighed but walked with Hadriana.

"Again, I'm sorry." she said quietly. The elf didn't reply. "I will make sure you don't get a punishment, I swear it." she added.

"I would thank you for that, they do terrible things to us." he managed to say to her.

"How long have you been a slave, Leto?" she questioned.

"Ever since I can remember." he told her.

"How old are you?"

"Twelve."

"I am as well,"

"Really?"

"Shut up, slave!" Hadrianaa snapped, turning and giving him another smack. Leto stumbled backward at her blow and Emily stood in front of him, arms out in defense.

"Leave him be," she hissed. "He didn't do anything!"

"Serah," Hadriana began. "This slave knows not to speak."

"He was speaking with me!" Emily pointed out.

"Even so." Hadriana scoffed, turning and stalking away. Emily extended a hand to Leto and he took it.

"Let me help," she murmured. He didn't reply, and Emily knew it was probably in fear of being hit again.

She sighed, she had always hated slavery, sexism and racism. Emily had an idea, however, she would help these slaves, the ones she met, anyway. She'd protect them, help them, try to free them, even if it meant, costing her, her life...


	2. Right Before Dinner

"Here we are," Hadriana signaled to a mansion. "Now, I will go and speak with lord Dana-" she was cut off as a younger girl, about seven it seemed, ran from out of some bushes. She wore her red hair in pony tails and was in a simple, long green dress.

"Leto!" she squeaked.

"Hello, Varania," he replied. The younger girl gave him a hug and he patted her head. Emily smiled, she could see the resemblance in their features, it must've been his little sister.

"Who's this?" Varania asked, looking over to Emily after a moment.

"Girl!" Hadirana snapped. "Leave serah Hawke alone and go...do something."

"I don't mind, Hadriana, really." Emily assured then turned to Varania. "I'm Emily,"

"Welcome, mistress Emily." Varania replied with a bow.

"No need for that," she said. "But thank you." the girl reminded her of Bethany in a few ways. Hadriana rolled her eyes.

"Like I was saying before I was interrupted," she shot a glare to Varania. "I will go speak with lord Danarius. I will lead you to the library and you can wait there as I do." she said and opened the door then stepped in. Emily and her father fallowed. Hadriana turned.

"You two, slaves!" she snapped. "Come, we will need drinks for them."

Leto took Varania's hand inn his own before they fallowed, the young elven girl stayed close to her brother.

Hadriana led them down them through a few hallways, passed many closed doors. Emily noticed slaves everywhere, though, fear was in their eyes.

"Alright," Hadriana said when she stopped and opened a door. She led Emily and Malcome in and the two Ferelden apostates took a seat. "Wait here while I go and speak with lord Danarius, I shall not be long. And if you need anything, feel free to ask the slaves." she looked at Varania and Leto. "They are here to serve, of course." the apprentice left, the door sliding shut.

Malcome sighed.

"Em," he said. "While we're here, be careful. Alright?"

"I will be," she promised. It was silent for a few moments.

The door finally opened. A man with graying hair and a staff came in, Hadriana by his side.

"Hello," he greeted them. "I am magister Danarius."

"Malcome Hawke." Emily's father stood with his greeting. "This is my daughter, Emily."

"It's is a pleasure," Danarius said. "Now, what exactly happened? My apprentice was vague."

"I wasn't watching where I was going and I ran into Leto, messere. It is my fault, not his." Emily explained. "My staff snapped, but it was nearly broken anyway."

"Well, my dear, I have plenty to replace it." he said. "As for the slave, I will think of something."

"Do not punish him!" she blurted. "He doesn't deserve any kind of punishment. Like I said, he did nothing."

"I will consider it." Danarius told her. "Even so, Hadriana, why don't you show miss Hawke to a room. I would like to speak with her father."

"Yes lord." Hadirana said.

"And have the slave stay with her. Send his sister to their mother." the magister added before leaving with Malcome.

"Of course." she replied then turned to Varania. "You heard, go to your mother."

Leto let go of his sisters hand and the young girl ran off. Hadriana then turned to Emily, who had gotten to her feet. Emily nodded and Hadriana left, with her and Leto fallowing.

They went down a few more winding hallways and then Hadriana stopped before a door, she opened it and beckoned Emily to enter.

"There is everything you will need. Clean clothing, a bed, all of it. As for your father, he will get a room after speaking with lord Danarius. And you, serah, will get a staff tomorrow at the latest." Hadriana explained then turned and left.

Emily went over and sat on the bed, the sheets were silk, the curtains that were tied around engraved wooden rods, velvet. The room was quite large. There was a vanity next to the wardrobe, an assortment of brushes, combs and make-up covered the top of it. The wardrobe had marvelous carvings on it, the knobs to open it were golden.

It was a dim lit room, lit by candle light. And the carpet felt soft under foot as she removed her shoes. The walls were painted a dark purple and red.

"Do you need anything, mistress?" Leto asked her.

"No, I am fine, but thank you." she said, tying back her hair. "Leto, tell me though, have you ever wondered what it'd be like to be free? To be rid of them?"

"To be honest, yes, I have." he admitted. "I do wonder, but I will never know. What is it like, mistress?"

"I do not even know the full feeling." she murmured. "I am always hunted by the Templars, and I have to hide my magic, to hide from the Circle." she paused. "But I do have some freedom, I suppose. It is a good feeling, to be free."

"It is?" he asked.

"Yes," she confirmed. "To be able to do things you wish to, say things you want to." she got to her feet and took one of his hands in her own. "You know, I might be able to make it so you and your family are free. I could work for coin, buy you from Danarius then let you all go free. I know I could do it."

"Do not trouble yourself with the thought, mistress." he told her.

"I wouldn't mind, I do not approve of slavery, you know." she told him. "Leto, I have not known you long, not even a day, but nobody deserves this, and you, you are kind from what I know."

"Mistress..." he managed.

"I would do it. I swear I would." she continued. "Listen, if I couldn't get the coin, I would kill any magister who tried to stop me from freeing you all. I am only twelve, yes, but I am powerful, my father has shown me everything he knows." It was silent and there was a knock on the door. Emily took her hand away as the door opened.

"Em, it's only me." her father said. "We're staying for a while. And, I was told that dinner will be soon. I will be in the room down the hall, I should write to your mother." he paused. "If you need me, come get me."

"Alright, father." she said as he closed the door again. Emily turned back to Leto. "Do I need to wear anything for dinner, or can I stay in my gown?"

"You can wear what you wish, mistress, but like what was said, there are clean clothing in your wardrobe." he replied. "And if you wish to change, I will leave."

"Hm..." she hummed. "I think I may change, but I may need help depending." she added, walking over to the wardrobe. She opened it and looked at the clothes inside. Dresses hung, some embroidered, others trimmed with jewels, some stitched with gold, a few of silk or lace or velvet.

Emily's eyes widened, she had never worn something so elegant, so fanciful. She pulled out a white dress with gold trimming, a few diamonds were stitched into it.

"This is...this is beautiful!" she gasped. "Is everything here like in Orlias?"

"Like in Orlias?" he asked her, blinking.

"Oh, right, you've never been there, have you?"

"I have not, no, mistress."

"Okay, sorry." she paused. "Leto, would you mind calling me Emily?"

"As you wish, mistress Emily."

"No, just Emily."

"Of course...Emily." he managed. She smiled sweetly.

"Alright, now, help me into this dress and then I need to brush my hair. Hm..." she glanced at the vanity. "I think that's it."

"As you wish," he repeated. Emily took off her current gown and he turned away from her.

"Oh come now," she teased. "I can't be that bad to look at."

"It is not that," he told her, back still facing her. "Slaves are not supposed to look when masters or mistresses undress."

"I see." she pursed her lips. "Fine. Give me a few moments then, alright?" she said, slipping the dress on. She zipped the side of it and then straightened it. The sleeves hung around her shoulders, the dress ended at her ankles and the hem of the waist gathered on her hips.

"There, now for my hair." she asked. He turned back to her.

Emily untied her hair and sat in front of the vanity.

"Would you like help?" he asked.

"I can do my own hair, but I wouldn't mind." she responded. He took a brush and ran it through her hair a few times. The room was silent.

"There you are, mist-I mean Emily." he concluded, putting the brush down and stepping back.

"Thank you, Leto." she said, smiling again as she tied her hair back. There was soon another knock on the door.

"Serah Hawke," a familiar voice said. "Lord Danarius wanted me to get you for dinner. It is being served."

"Alright, Hadriana." she called back before turning back to Leto, who was holding a pair of shoes for her. "Again, thank you." she told him, taking the shoes and slipping them on. Emily then headed for the door and opened it. "I'll see you later," she said then left.


	3. Crush

Emily had never had such a dinner before. But it was now late, and she was on her way to her room. She yawned.

The door to her room opened easily and she entered. She slipped off her shoes and put them next to the vanity, then began to unzip the dress. The dress fell around her ankles and she bent down, picking it up. Emily then took a nightgown that had lain folded on her bed, it was golden and made of silk with lace around the bottom.

She slipped it on and sat on the bed, her mind humming with thoughts. She heard a knock on the door.

"Emily," the person called. She looked to the door and smiled.

"Leto, hello." she greeted. He stepped in.

"Mistress Hadriana said I still had to stay with you." he explained.

"I see," Emily said. "I'm just going to bed, but, where do you keep the books?" as she asked he pointed to a desk in the room. She got up and opened the drawers, taking out a book with curved lettering on the front.

She went back over and sat on the bed, propping herself up on the pillows and opening the book.

"Why don't you sleep?" she asked Leto as he just stood there. He shrugged then sat on the floor, hesitating to lay down. "No," Emily interrupted. "If you sleep, it's not on the floor."

"I am used to it," he told her, sitting back up.

"Used to it or not, sleep in a chair, or come sleep in the bed." she told him. He blinked and looked at her, but got to his feet. "The floor can't be comfortable," she continued. "And if sleeping in the bed is so bad, go ahead, sleep in a chair, just anything but the ground, alright?"

Leto stayed silent but took a seat on the bed and then moved and laid next to her.

"Better," she said. "Would you like to read?"

"I...I do not know how," he confessed. "Slaves never learn."

"Then I will teach you, it's not too late to learn." she offered.

"If you don't mind, I would like that." he agreed.

"Good, after I teach you some off the basics, we should sleep, yes?" she asked, shifting to show him the book.

-x-x-x-

Light shone through the gaps in the curtains and Emily blinked open her eyes slowly.

Close to her face was Leto's. She had forgotten that she had offered for him to sleep in the bed. Emily smiled. He looked so peaceful, so free and happy as he slept. His hand held one of hers in it's grip and she sighed. She would find a way to free him from this slavery.

His face was so close to her own, and his breathing said he was still asleep. The elf shifted and his lips brushed hers. Emily felt her face turn warm. She had not known him long, but she cared for him, she knew it.

Leto's eyes flickered open. In seconds he moved away from her.

"I am sorry," he murmured to her, looking away.

"I do not mind," she whispered, sitting up. They were twelve, not very old but she knew she still cared for him, not that she could say it. Emily swung her feet over the side of the bed and got up.

"I...I need to know where the bath is," she explained. "If you would show me, then I'd be glad."

"I will show you," he agreed, getting up and heading for the door. Emily fallowed, still blushing.

-x-x-x-

It did not take long for her to reach the bath, minutes really.

Leto had said he would wait outside for her and she had nodded before slipping into the bath. Her nightgown laid in a pile with her panties and bra in a pile next to the bath. The hot water felt nice on her skin.

She sighed and sunk lower into the water. She wasn't used to anything this fancy either, she was a Ferelden, hell, she was even an apostate. Her mother, Leandra, she knew of the finer things, being an Amell, who were nobility in Kirkwall, but the Hawke line were Ferelden, like now.

Something hit her mind. Emily had no clue how her mother, Bethany or Carver were getting along, and with Bethany being an apostate as well...but she had more control, then Emily, she was calmer too, Emily had been known to set things on fire when made upset.

"Like the time with the horse..." she murmured. Yes, she had set a horse on fire, she was angry and she was young.

She thought of her brother now, Carver. He was a broody, snarky little boy, he'd end up in more trouble then Bethany would, and it'd always be like that more then likely. He was a handful by himself, for mother and father both.

Between hiding Bethany, taking care of Carver, father and her being gone, plus everyday things, her mother must surely be going insane. If not, she soon would be.

Emily giggled. Hopefully, Leandra would stay sane, for a long while.

She lifted a hand out of the bath, her fingers were wrinkled already. Emily stood and stepped out, grabbing a towel near her and wrapping it around her body. She made sure it wouldn't fall then squeezed the water from her hair, then picked up her dirty clothing and opened the door to head for her room.

-x-x-x-

The next dress she decided to wear was that more simpler, it was blue with silver hem this time. After she had gotten dressed, Leto helped her with her hair again and she tied it like always.

"Thank you," she said, getting up. Emily looked around the room and spotted the book from last night. "Do you want more reading lessons?" she asked.

"If it is no trouble, I'd enjoy that." he replied. "The words are...frustrating, but you explain things quite well."

"That's good," she smiled, feeling her face turn pink with the praise. She took the book and sat down, he sat down next to her. Emily opened the book and began.


	4. Truth

It had been a week since they had begun staying with the magisters, Emily spent most her time either in her room teaching Leto to read or playing with Varania.

She had already gotten her new staff, it was wooden and painted black, with a claw like hand on the top holding a golden sphere. Gems were studded a few places in the wood, as well.

She sighed and rolled over onto her back, head dangling off the side of the bed. The room was quiet, she was bored out of her mind and had nothing to do, nothing but think really.

Emily had thought many times of what to say to Leto, she had to, or so she thought. Maybe she shouldn't say she had a crush on him since they were so different, but she knew she should. The worst she could think of is him running off, but they were friends, from what she knew, maybe he wouldn't, maybe he liked her like that.

The door opened with a slight squeak and she rolled back onto her stomach.

"Hello," she greeted. "I was going to come and find you later, Leto, but I thought you were with your sister."

"I was," he said simply. "What did you need, Emily?"

She was silent and averted his eyes. She had never had to admit how she felt, not once. Emily sat up then swung her feet over the bed and looked to him. She bit her bottom lip before she spoke.

"I..." Emily trailed off, searching her mind for the right words. "Leto, I don't really know how to say this, but I...I have a crush on you."

He didn't speak, only blinked, her words seemed to take no affect.

"I know, I'm an apostate and your a slave, but I care, alright? I...I just don't know." she continued. "I am young, as are you, yes, but..." Emily trailed off. She expected him to run off, but instead he moved forward and sat next to her, taking one of her hands in his.

"I do not know how to reply to that." he told her. "I am shocked, utterly so, yet...I am happy. I somewhat feel the same way, but slaves are not permitted to to love their masters or their mistresses. Will I be punished?"

"But I am not your mistress though," she pointed out. "And no, you will not be punished, I will not allow it," she promised, smiling and continued. "Leto, if it's the last thing I do, I will make sure you, Varania and your mother are free, I swear to it."

"Emily, I thank you." he managed. There was suddenly a knock on the door and they pulled their hands apart, Emily sitting on the the bed still, a book open on her lap, and Leto standing against the wall in front of her.

"Em," he father greeted. "I just wanted to tell you we leave tomorrow."

"What!" she asked, looking up to him. "Why?"

"We need to get back to your mother and siblings," he explained.

"Alright," she responded.

"And, Em, I was told you could take whatever you wished too." he added before leaving her. Emily closed the book and tossed it aside then got up.

"I have to speak with Danarius," she concluded.

"Why?" Leto asked her.

"Because, if I can take anything, maybe I can take slaves, and I can, then I will take you, Varania and your mother, then you will be free, rid of them and of your chains." she told him, turning to the wardrobe. "I will pack, then I will go speak with him. I will find someway to get you free, I swear." she added, taking each dress down and then tossing them onto the bed. Emily took out a bag and stuffed them in it, then went for the shoes and a few other things from the vanity.

"Are you sure?" Leto questioned.

"Of course I am," she said and closed her bag. "There, now, give me ten or twenty minutes. I will be back," with that, she gave a wink and headed for the door.

-x-x-x-

"That depends on which slaves." Danarius told her.

"Leto, Varania and their mother, that is all I ask." she replied.

"Those three?" he asked. "I do not think so, miss Hawke, I am sorry."

"And why not?" Emily crossed her arms. What could he have planned?

"I have my reasons, " he said simply. "They are none of your business. However, you are welcome to others."

"I want them," she snapped. "And only them."

"I told you no, so I guess you will have to go without." Danarius concluded, leaving her. Emily's blood boiled. It wasn't fair, not only could she not free them, but also everything else.

She wouldn't give up though, she would free them, she'd fight them if she had too.

Either way, she might as well go back to her room, she'd spend the rest of her time planning, and speaking with Leto.

Emily slightly smiled as she headed back to her room. There was at least something she had a reason to be happy about.

"A mage and a slave, both only twelve." she muttered. "And it all started because of a broken staff."


	5. Good Bye, But Only For Now

Emily was dead tired on her feet. She spent the whole last night awake, knowing she'd have to leave and that she was unable to take Leto and Varania with her. For that, she was angry with herself, her words before were empty, she had no coin and if she fought, she would probably die.

But she'd return, more powerful then before, and she'd make a difference in Tevinter, make sure there were no longer slaves, that not one person had to live through slavery, and she'd free them all, then be with Leto and Varania again, she promised herself, and them, it's what she would do.

Her last conversation with her friends rung in her ears.

-x-x-x-

_The sun was bright and it warmed her skin, Emily stretched as the wind stirred a few wisps of her dark brown hair. She blinked her golden eyes slowly shut then open again._

_Varania tugged at her skirt and she looked down to her girl._

"_Why are you leaving, mistress Emily?" the little girl asked her._

"_I have family," Emily replied. "My mother, my sister and my brother are still in Lothering, I have to go back to them."_

"_Can't I come with you?" Varania questioned._

"_Shut up, slave!" Hadriana interrupted. "You are a slave, you are here to serve, and will not argue." the apprentice smacked Varania and the little girl whimpered. Emily put herself between Hadriana and Varania._

"_Leave her be, she only asked me a simple question!" Emily growled. Hadriana rolled her eyes with an irritated sigh before crossing her arms and walking off._

"_Are you alright?" Emily continued, turning to Varania. "Did she hit you hard?"_

"_I am fine, I am used to her blows." Varania shrugged._

_'No seven year old should be used to getting beaten, no matter what the age, nobody should be used to this abuse. And they don't deserve this.' she thought._

"_But mistress Emily, I wish you good travels, I do, and I can't wait to see you again, I've had such fun playing with you in the garden." the girl continued. "Give your family my regards, good bye." she concluded, giving Emily a hug, then she ran off._

_Emily smiled, she'd miss the young elf, sure, her siblings were young, but Carver was broody and always trouble, while Bethany was quiet and calm, they were unlike the energetic and happy elven girl._

_She felt a hand touch her own and she turned, her face close to Leto's._

"_Come to wish me off?" she asked him. "I am truly sorry you and your sister cannot some, it is the thing I most regret."_

"_You did try, did you not?" Leto pointed out. "That is what means the most."_

"_I will miss you," she murmured. "And if anything, I will come back, I will help you. I will once I am powerful, a powerful mage, when I am just that, I will be back, I will free you, and kill anybody who tries to stop me. So do not forget me, alright?"_

"_How could I forget you?" he questioned._

"_It's been known to happen," she shrugged. "Even so, I do make that promise." they were both silent for a few moments._

"_Emily, come on!" her father called to her. Emily looked at the direction his voice had come._

"_One moment!" she yelled back then looked back to Leto. "Good bye, but only for now."_

"_Yes, only for now." he agreed, giving her a quick kiss. Emily blushed at the touch of his lips._

"_Emily!" her father called again. Leto let her go and she gave him a hug._

"_I don't know if I should say this, but I love you." she whispered._

"_And I do not know if I should reply to that but, I love you as well." he told her. Emily smiled sweetly at him before running off. Emily turned and waved then continued to her father._

-x-x-x-

Her mind spun, and Emily could still feel his touch. It wasn't fair! It just wasn't! She thought maybe it would have been better if she never met them, or if she never came with her father, but then she'd regret it, and she had finally met people she cared for outside of her family.

"Are you okay, Em? You seem distracted." her father commented.

"Hm? Oh, yeah, I'm fine." she managed. Malcome turned to her and put a hand on her shoulder.

"Em, you're still irritated by slavery, aren't you?" he asked. She nodded.

"Nobody deserves that," she muttered. She wanted to say why else, but he'd say she was too young for a relationship, or that it was impossible because Leto was a slave.

"They don't, no." he agreed. For a few moments, neither spoke. "This is also about that one slave and his sister, isn't it?" he finally questioned her. Emily's heart pounded in her chest, did he already know?

"A bit," she said. "Varania, she is so young yet is used to that abuse, and she is such a sweet girl." Emily paused. "As for Leto, he became a good friend to me over the week. I cared for them both."

"I see." her father whispered. "I know you would've freed them if you could have, but you could not have, not now, anyway."

"I know," she told him. 'But I will find a way to.' she added in her mind. Malcome sighed.

"Let's get going, I'm sure your mother will be tearing her hair out by now." he chuckled, turning away from her and continuing on his way. Emily nodded, thoughts still crowding her mind.

"I am sorry, Leto, Varania, I really am." she whispered before running to catch up with her father.


	6. 12 years

**Alright, well, no more Leto, he'll be mentioned I mean, but it's now gonna be with best broody, fisting, puppy-eyed, tevinter warrior elf, yep. (I know, Fenris IS Leto, but since he doesn't remember and all, plus, he's quite different with the markings, or at least I think so) Heh, so yeah. Done with Leto, onto Fenris (that sounded bad)**

**Anyhow, some of the dialog will, for certain or at least maybe, be exactly the same, but tweaked or something, or just the exact same. And I know it may cause some of them to be out of character, but if the story changes, the characters might just a bit as well, right? Even so, I hope you all liked the bit in Tevinter (poor Emily and Leto, both only 12 and their hearts were broken :'[ ) Now...To Kirkwall! :p**

**I don't know exactly how long this will be, and not everything in each act will be mentioned (of course) I might do something after they flee Kirkwall after the battle with Meredith and all (Varric DID tell Cassandra they fled and things forced them all but the romance from Hawke's side, yes?) and some twists may occur during the process (woould you expect everything to be easy? Nothing is ever easy, and it being Hawke and all, that's double right there.)**

**But yeah, please enjoy, and please review! (Oh! About the chapter length, I'm trying to make them longer, I REALLY am, but I fail most the time. Sometimes success, other times, well, just fail...sometimes epicly so)**

-x-x-x-

Emily tied back her hair, it had been twelve years, twelve sodding years. She hadn't kept her word, and she hated herself for it. She remembered everything about him perfectly, or perfectly from when he was twelve, that is. But either way, she missed the elf like hell, and her heart ached at points.

The mage sighed, she regretted it, if only she had stayed longer...

She shook her head, nobody in her family had found out about her crush or the kiss, and she hoped that nobody, slave or magister or even Varania, found out they had kissed, or fallen in love with one another. Like Leto had told her, he would've been punished, and she wanted anything but that.

It was time she forgot, but she thought of him everyday, such beautiful green eyes and black hair, his pointed ears and soft voice.

Emily blinked her eyes shut and then opened them. She needed to just forget, to just let everything go, but she could not, and she actually almost feared that she would never. But she needed to focus, on other things. On getting the estate back, on getting into the Deep Roads, with doing all these things, and now, she found herself in the same rut, the same as twelve years before; in love with an elf, an ex-slave even.

He was a warrior, snow white hair that turned almost silver in the moon light, and such big moss green eyes, and a voice that made her melt, and was about as broody as Carver. Even with that, he wasn't fond of her, mainly because she was an apostate.

What was strange, was he used to be a slave of Danarius, a bodyguard, in fact. Maybe he had known Leto. Maybe he had come after she left. Emily had no idea, but either way, she wouldn't get an answer, he wouldn't talk to her much, but she had managed to get a few chuckles and a few smiles from him.

Emily blinked, she wished she could talk to Bethany, they had always been able to come to one another when it concerned these kinds of things, but her sister was dead, was gone and had been so for two years. That sodding ogre had killed her, in seconds even.

The apostate grabbed her staff and headed for the door out of Gamlen's house, she was tired of being inside, she needed a drink, and plus, tonight was the night for the weekly game, or games that is, of Wicked Grace at the Hanged Man...

-x-x-x-

"That's it!" Anders concluded, tossing down his cards. The healer had lost already fifty sovereigns, and was about to lose more, to Isabela. "I give up, she's cheating!" he pointed an accusing finger at Isabela.

"Doesn't she always cheat?" Aveline replied. "A whore, a liar, a thief, a drinker and a cheater. The list goes on. Do you expect anything else, Anders?"

"I didn't, no. And this, this is why Justice disapproves." he sighed.

"You know, Hawke's mabari plays better then you. So it might just be you, Blondie." Varric pointed out. Anders shot him a look and the dwarf held his hands up in defense. "Just telling the truth,"

Isabela took a drink.

"I didn't cheat, so it has to be you, Anders. Well, at least this round." the pirate said. Merrill giggled and looked at her cards.

"Are we going to continue, or not?" Fenris asked in irritation.

"You do know this is how it usually is, elf, stop your brooding, at least for tonight?" Varric joked. Emily sighed with a slight laugh. She took a drink of her ale and eyed her cards. If the game continued, she may just win.

"I could always teach him differently," Isabela offered with a wink. "You know, in another room."

"Oh no, I don't need to heal more people because of you and your diseases! I have enough people to take care of at it is!" Anders said. Isabela rolled her eyes.

"I don't have any diseases any more, you idiot." she responded, waving a hand innocently in the air.

"She came in a week ago, correct Anders?" Aveline asked. "She's probably gotten at least fifty or so by now, the whore."

"Can we just play!" Carver interrupted. "If the game doesn't continue, I'm going home. Emily, you can stay if you want to." the warrior got up but Merrill tugged at his arm.

"You don't think this is fun, messere Carver?" the elf asked, her big doe eyes full of curiosity.

"Uh..." Carver managed, face turning a shade of pink with embarrassment. Emily laughed quietly, she could tell he had a crush on the elven mage. Carver sat back down next to her and took up his cards again. Merrill smiled. Emily knew she had a crush on her brother, as well.

"Well, let's continue, shall we?" Emily questioned. "Or is the game over?"

"Yes, let's continue." Isabela agreed with a smirk. Varric nodded and took a drink of his liquor. Anders picked up his cards again.

"This is the last round I play." he huffed.

"Fine, then we can play without you or call this the last round for tonight. I have to get back to the barracks," Aveline agreed. "So, last round?"

"Alright," Emily said. "Last round." Each person echoed the two words and the game of Wicked Grace continued once more.


	7. Hadriana

**Sorry for the long wait of this chapter, life has gotten in the way of my writing time (and FemShep's website chat has been a distraction (they have a monthly FemShep RolePlay I love to do, so much fun to be had there! *cough* and I have friends on there and plus, AWESOME PEOPLE are on there, who I could name but the list would be longer then my actual fanfic, as well) but not my point! Well that and some others things, but still, not my point.)**

**Now, start act 2! Oh, and of course the beginning of the Fenris friendship romance! And plus the Hadriana death. Well, the romance will be different, more, let me say, dialog and hell, even action (he still leaves Hawke though, sorry for that, but I think it's something that plays a key part here) I may even fill in some of those missing years BioWare didn't mention. As well as the details! Let the romance and destruction and confusion...begin!**

**Also, you may notice Emily zoning out when meeting Hadriana (I do mention it) well she has to put the pieces together in act 3 not act 2, and confronting Hadriana on act 2 kinda ruins it, so she zoned out, I guess, so not to hear of Varania. Since, if she heard Varania was Fenris' sister, well, she'd figure out he's Leto before she's supposed to, and what's the fun in that? It's no fun, I say! (Plus it messes with the story line...)**

**Enjoy and please review, I love to hear people's thoughts and it helps me improve.**

-x-x-x-

Emily sighed, her feet ached from the long trek up to the Bone Pit.

Three years had passed from the Deep Roads, her brother was a Templar, and she lived in her own estate with Sandal, Bodahn, her Mother and her mabari, Lynx. She was also a very known regular at the Hanged Man.

The apostate slowed her pace to match that of her friend Fenris'. Isabela and Varric were talking in hushed tones behind her, probably more "friend fiction" they had written, and she was focused on a few things. The words mixed in her mind and she finally figured out how to say what she wanted to ask.

"Fenris," she began. "You have said you were a slave of Danarius, right?"

"I have said that I was, yes." he confirmed, looking at her.

"I...know of him, for years before I helped you, actually. I was in Tevinter when I was twelve. I stayed there, I...stayed in the mansion as him even. It was only for a week and a day but I remember it well. My father and I stayed. And during that stay I met some of the, uh, slaves. One of them, his name was Leto. And I made him a promise, one I never kept."

"What relevance does this have?" the warrior asked her.

"I...was um, wondering if you knew him? If you knew Leto or not or just don't recall." she explained, glancing away. She sounded like a blighted little girl!

"I do not recall, I am sorry." he replied simply before looking away. Emily sighed. Blighted shit! She probably just made a fool of herself in front of her friend. She muttered a few curses under her breath and her pace sped up.

"Hawke, why'd we even come back here?" Isabela asked, coming up behind her. Emily almost jumped, she hadn't thought the pirate was behind her.

"To check on the miners, Izzy. Since last time there were dragons and all. Plus, I am one of their bosses, so I need to check up on them. I want to-" she was cut off.

"You are in possession of stolen property, step away from the slave and you will be spared." a slaver yelled down at them. Emily stopped dead in her tracks, shit. She looked up to him with a snarl.

"I am not a slave!" Fenris spat, his skin tinting blue from the markings and he reached for his broad sword. A single word twitched from Emily's lips and the man fell to the ground in screams and flames. Emily's staff was in her hands in moments after, she was muttering spells under her breath, fire and ice sparked on her finger tips and points of the staff. Varric was already raining arrows from afar with Bianca and Isabela twisted with her daggers in hand, her hair flying and bouncing as she flipped around.

Blood exploded from the limbs of fallen slavers as Fenris cut through the rows, as well as Isabela. Varric hit most of the enemies between the eyes or in the heart with arrow after arrow. Others were burned or frozen and shattered from spells Emily cast.

Minute after minute passed, soon all the slavers were dead (in pieces, burning or shattered and melting) all but one. Fenris went over and bent down, pulling his face from the dirt by the brown hair. The slaver was a mage by the looks of what her wore.

"Where is he?" Fenris growled, slamming the man's head into the dirt before pulling it back up.

"Please...don't...kill me..." the man managed. "I...beg of...you..."

"Just tell me!" Fenris ordered before slamming the man's head to the ground again, this time harder. Emily winced, she knew the elf wasn't weak, and with such hate in his eyes, such anger, the force must have been much more then any other time.

"I...do not...know...I swear I do...not...Hadriana...she brought us..." the man explained. "She's in...the holding caves...just north of the city...I can...I can show you the way..."

"No need, I know already," the elven warrior said simply.

"Then please...let me...go..."

"No, you chose the wrong master." in one movement Fenris snapped the man's neck and stood. "Hadriana." he spat the name in hate, venom in his voice. Emily had never seen him so upset, so angry. "I was a fool to think I was free, they will never let me be!"

"I...I know of her. Of Hadriana." Emily muttered. "A cold hearted bitch beyond repair."

"Yes, and a sniveling social climber who would sell her own children if she thought Danarius would be pleased by her doing so." he agreed. "If she is here, it is at his bidding. I knew it, I knew he would not let this go!"

"Why are we standing around then? Let's pay her a visit." Emily said, hands sparking with mana and energy that burned inside her. It was about time she got answers, years of waiting, years of regret, maybe she could find Leto and set things straight, even see if things were like before or not. Hell, she would like to see even Varania again, just even once.

After she got the answers, he could do what he wished. She wanted answers, he wanted her dead, they would both get what they needed and wanted.

"We must go, quickly. If not, she will have time to prepare, or to flee." he said. She nodded and let him take the lead to the holding caves. It was about damn time she could see the bitch, who smack others around like shit and dirt, killed.

-x-x-x-

The fight was short when they found her, it was easy just as much. Hadriana fell to the ground, her staff out of her reach by meters.

"Serah Hawke?" she asked, noticing Emily. "It is you! I remember you. Just a week but you were a pain in the ass. Of course it would be you helping a slave, still the same goody paragon kindness from even then."

"Hadriana, still the same cold heart bitch, I see." Emily mused. "Not why we're here. You answer my questions, then I let him do what he needs to."

"Oh? Answers to what?" the magister scoffed. Emily stiffened and her hands tensed into fists. She would beat it out of her if she had to.

"Where is he? What happened to him?" she questioned.

"Who? I know many." Hadriana snapped. Energy sparked from Emily's finger tips as her hands loosened, she was seconds away from setting the bitch on fire.

"Leto! Now answer me! Now!" there was a brutal edge to her voice that made her companions behind her gape, the kind apostate never was hateful (unless her family or close friends were hurt, then she was hateful to the person who had done it) but to Hadriana, she might as well be spitting venom and breathing fire.

"I will not answer that. Ask your slave friend." Hadriana replied. Emily's blood began to boil as fire twirled around her hands. She turned to Fenris.

"I am done, do what you need." she told him. She wasn't going to get answers, but, she knew she'd find others to tell her, she would beat it out of somebody, and if she could choose, that person would be Danarius himself.

"Gladly," Fenris growled, taking his weapon in hand. He aimed the blow at Hadriana's neck and was about to strike when she called out.

"Stop! You do not want me dead!" she screamed, holding her hands in front of her face in defense.

"Why not?" he asked in a snarl. "There is only one person I want dead more!"

"I have information, slave. I will trade it for my life!" she told him quickly.

"The location of Danarius? Bah! What good will that do me? I'd rather her lost his pet pupil!" the elf spat. Emily was zoning out she was so angry and did not catch the next part, but in seconds, their was a gasp and a thud as Hadriana hit the ground.

Fenris gripped her heart in his hand and crushed it, tossing aside the remains. Blood poured from the dead magister's chest and dripped from his blood soak gantlet.

"Are you...alright?" Emily asked, he looked shocked but he was still angry, green eyes flashing between hate and pain.

"No! If Hadirana knew about my sister then Danarius has to know as well! Even if he doesn't trying to find her would be suicide, either way it would be!" the elf looked at her and turned away. "I need...I need to go." Emily reached out a hand and grabbed his shoulder.

"Do you want to talk?" she offered. He shook her hand off.

"No I do not want to talk!" he snapped. "But all that matters, is I finally got to crush that bitch's heart. May she rot and all the other mages with her!"with that he left, his pace quick. Emily sighed, she was a fool, she should have let him be.

"Hawke, are you okay?" Isabela asked her. Emily turned and looked at the pirate.

"Izzy, I'm just feeling stupid. I...let's go. I could use a drink, I'll even buy." she replied, changing the subject.

"You don't want to go after him?" Varric arched an eyebrow at her. "Goldie, I'm shocked."

"There is nothing I can do, Varric, I know that." she managed. "Let's just...go. Like I said, Hanged Man, drinks on me."

"Alright, but I am buying." Varric told her. Isabela took Emily's hand and tried helped the apostate back through the caves, Varric fallowing.

-x-x-x-

It was late in the evening when Emily finally left the Hanged Man to go to her estate. She was drunk slightly and Varric saw to it she got home. She entered her house as soon as the dwarf left to return to the tavern, her jaw dropping when she saw none other then Fenris waiting for her, just sitting there on a bench, starring at the floor but looking up and standing when he saw her enter.

"Fenris?" she asked. Maybe it was just the ale (or 'piss', as it was known to her) she had drunk playing tricks on her. But he got up and walked over to her.

"I am...sorry." he apologized. "About what happened with Hadriana. I took out my anger on you, and you did not deserve that. So, I am sorry."

"Apology accepted, Fenris. I was just worried about you." she admitted. "I...looked for you a bit on the way back to the city and through it, stopped by your mansion. I was worried where you were."

"I am sorry for worrying you as well." he told her. Emily smiled softly at him, her smile sweet and real, not those faked, her smiles were always genuine. "Hadriana just..when I was a slave, she hounded my sleep, denied me meals, I was powerless to respond, and she knew that. Even just the thought of her slipping out of my grasp again...I wanted to let her go, but I could not, I just...couldn't." he paused. "I...did not come here to burden you with my problems, I will go." he turned but she grabbed him by the fore arm.

"Fenris, no, it's no burden on me. Don't go." she told him. He spun around quickly, markings aglow, and pinned her to the wall. Her eyes flooded with concern that she had hurt him, but in moments the glow faded and they were kissing, lips locked together, tongues exploring each other's mouths. She twisted and pinned him against the wall, feeling his hands on her hips, the metal gauntlet claws were cold even through her robes and scraped at her flesh. His lips were warm, soft as well. She was gentle even in a kiss, not wanting to hurt him. She cared for him, and he did for her.

Emily pulled her face away and took a breath, blinking her golden eyes. She looked at him, gold locked with green.

"Would you like to go to my room?" she asked. He took her by the hand in silence and they headed for the stairs, careful not to disturb any other in the house. Bodahn and Sandal were in the library and Leandra had gone to take Lynx for a late evening walk, then Orana (the newest addition to her household) was cleaning up papers on her desk.

As they entered the room, Emily shut the door and locked it with a click. She put her staff next to her desk and took a long red cloth from a mound of papers, spinning back to face the elf in the room she smirked and held it out to him.

"Take this, I want you to have it." she told him. Fenris took it in hand, eying it.

"Is it important to you? Or just a cloth?" he asked her. Emily was silent for a moment before replying.

"Well, um, my father gave it to me, it was so my staff didn't fly from my hand when I first stared using one, I was clumsy as a young girl, you know, butter fingers and all." she slightly laughed. "I wore this a lot after he died as a reminder, and I sometimes still do, but I...I think you should have it."

"Hawke, you keep it." he told her. "It was a gift from your father, so keep it. I do not want to take something of such importance." Fenris offered it back to her and she took it then ripped it in half, offering back half.

"Half for me, half for you then." she said. He hesitated but took it and cupped her face with one hand, kissing her cheek lightly.

"Thank you," he murmured in her ear. She smiled, his voice was sweet, a thing she loved to hear, when he spoke, nothing bothered her.

Emily tied her half around her wrist then got to undoing her robes.

"Come on," she teased. "Are we just going to stand here all night in silence?" he chuckled at her and began taking off his own chest plate ant other pieces of clothing. For once, something was going right for her, and it made her smile. She loved him, she may have loved before but...Leto was gone, she would find him, she knew she would, but in a romance...a crush at the age of twelve meant almost nothing after this many years had passed.

-x-x-x-

Light shown through the window of Hawke's room, through the gaps in the curtains at least. Fenris sat up, she was sleeping peacefully beside him, her soft snoring a sweet sound.

Images played through his mind, but none he knew what of. An elven girl with dark red hair and an elven boy with black playing in a courtyard, the same boy and a human girl with brown hair in bed with a book, places and people sped through his mind.

He sat on the edge of the bed, legs over the side and held his head in his hands. It hurt is a way, and he had no idea of even what he was seeing or when it all was, but the girl, the one with brown hair, she had golden eyes. She looked familiar, the smile, the way she sat and stood, how she held a staff or book.

It only took moments for him to relize it was Hawke. It was Emily Hawke, but younger, maybe only twelve years old or so, but it was her, he knew it was.

There was a moan beside him as Emily turned and faced him, her eyes still shut as she slept. He carefully got up, trying not to disturb her or make noise to wake the rest of the house. He began to dress and then he waited by the fireplace, starring in to the burning and crackling embers. He would wait for her to awake and then leave, but he would try to explain with what words he could.

Images kept flashing and he worked on what to tell the apostate when she did awake.

-x-x-x-

Her eyes blinked open and she sat up, looking next to her. Gone. Propping herself up on her forearm she saw him next to the fireplace. Her free hand held the sheet to her chest, clutching it.

"Was it that bad?" she asked jokingly.

"Hm? No, it is not that, it was fine. No, that is insufficient, it was better then I ould have ever dreamed, beyond that even."

She glanced away but then back to him. Had she hurt him? Maybe the markings...

"Is it your markings? Do they hurt?" she questioned, eyes flooding with concern.

"No it's...I began to remember, just flashes of my past. But it was too much, too much to bear, I...can't. This is...is too fast." he wondered if her should tell her that he saw her in some of those images, but he may have been wrong, maybe it was not her.

"So, your ending it?" her expression saddened instantly.

"I'm sorry, I feel like such a fool." with that, he turned and left her. Emily felt the tears well up behind her eyes and she watched him walked away, the door shut behind him and she pulled her knees up to her chin and held them close with her arms, resting her forehead on her knees.

Tears streamed down her face. Once before she had left, but now, she was the one being left. What was to happen between them?

"Blighted idiot," she muttered. "I am such a sodding idiot. So stupid!" soon she fell silent and the only sound was the birds outside her window and her own weeping.


	8. Festival of Stars

**Okay, well, time to fill some of the gap between acts 2 and 3 (like I said, this story is more key points, expect time skips, not 3 years always like in game, but some kind of time skips, I won't write when they go the bathroom and when they shower and things, unless that's key, and let me say, going to the bathroom is NOT key, well, bathroom sexytimez, but...never mind.)**

**Anyhow, let's see what Fenris thinks of Emily when she's all dressed up for a festival, The Stars Festival, that is! (Time to pull out a pretty dress, Em, see if you can make him speachless, hell even drool!)**

**Read, review, and enjoy...**

-x-x-x-

Did she care what he thought? She did, yes, and she wanted to amaze him. But after how things were going...sure, they were friends, sure they dealt with one another everyday, and sure they did manage to not bring up that night, but could it mean he still thought she looked beautiful or not?

Emily sighed and strapped on her heels. A nice night out was just what she needed, and she wanted to have fun with all her companions, her friends, but she'd trade that for her romance life back, she just wanted things to be alright between her and Fenris. Friends or not, nothing was ever the same, and it would never be again.

The door of her room opened and Aveline came in. The guard was not in a dress, but not in her normal armor, just something simple but still her style.

"Hawke," she greeted. Emily looked up to her away from her heels.

"Just getting my shoes on, Aveline. The others already leave?" Emily replied, looking back down to finish her shoe.

"Yes, well, all but Fenris. He said he'd go with you." she explained. Emily felt her skin get hot. Alone on the way to the festival with Fenris? The Maker had such a grand sense of humor tonight, didn't He! She would loved to be alone with the elf, if things had gone differently. Now there were awkward pauses and silences, well most the time, there were exceptions.

"Thank you Aveline, you can leave and I'll be out soon, tell, but tell Fenris I will only be a few more moments as you leave, would you?" Emily faked a smile for once and Aveline looked at her like she knew it was faked.

"All right, Hawke, I will." the guard captain replied before disappearing from Emily's sight. The apostate finished with her shoes and stood, stumbling a bit but gaining her balance. She tucked her hair behind her ear and headed for the door, stopping before the chandelier, her heels clicked with each step she made.

Emily looked down below her, Fenris stood talking with Bodahn then looked up to her, eyes wide. He must have liked the dress, or, maybe hated it and was shocked she would wear such a stupid thing.

The dress was white and hugged her hips, gems were sewn on the sleeves that hung around her arms and it was stitched with golden thread. A red cloth was tied around her wrist and her brown hair framed her face perfectly, her lis were pink and her eyelids shadowed with a copper color.

Emily managed to walk to and down the stairs without falling or hurting herself. Fenris came over and offered her a hand, she took it to steady herself. She smiled at him greatfully as they headed to and out the door.

"Thank you, Fenris." she said.

"It is no problem, Hawke. You have helped me, I can return the favor." he told her simply. She nodded in reply and they headed for the festival.

Soon, the air was filled with beautiful music as well of the smell of roasting meat and sweet wine. Nobles danced to the music, smiles on their faces, laughs coming from their lips.

"Well, look who it is!" Varric greeted Emily and Fenris, raising a goblet, that was adored by rubies and diamonds as well as made of silver, of wine in the air then lowering it to take a drink. Emily took a seat next to him and Fenris next to Isabela.

"Yes, do you think I would miss this?" Emily asked the dwarf with a grin as she poured herself a goblet of wine, her own goblet was golden and adored with saphires and opals.

Merrill giggled across the table as Isabela whispered something in her ear. Aveline shot her a glare as sharp as daggers then turned as her husband, Donnic, came over to her. Emily took a drink of her wine and sighed, hopefully the night would be peaceful, but with who she was, was that even possible?

The suddenly music slowed and Emily felt a tap on her shoulder. She turned and saw Fenris behind her.

"What is it, Fenris?" she asked. He held out a hand to her.

"Would you care to dance?" he asked her. She smiled and took his hand with a nod then let him lead her to the dance floor.

-x-x-x-

Emily took a drink of her wine, she hadn't expected for Fenris to ask her to dance, and he was really good to, better then she thought.

Her mind began to swirl with thoughts and she shook her head, trying to scatter them but they lingered. She needed to get away, maybe take a walk for a bit.

The apostate got to her feet and pushed in her chair, taking one last drink to finish of her wine.

"Where are you going, Hawke?" Isabela questioned, licking meat juice from her lips.

"For a walk," Emily replied simply, turning to go. She just needed to get away for a bit, not long, only a little bit.

"Are you sure you want to go alone?" Anders asked her. "I could go with you, if you like." At that moment, Fenris got up after taking a drink from a wine bottle.

"If anybody goes with Hawke, I will." he said. Emily sighed, hopefully they wouldn't start fighting over this. She wanted to go alone but...maybe it was better if Fenris actually did come with her, but if Anders did...maker what would she do? He was a good friend but being alone with him...she couldn't even bear to think like that.

Anders didn't say anything else, but it was clear he wanted to. Emily sighed in relief and Fenris came over to her.

"Fenris, I...let's go." she said and in moments she took off away from the festival and only looked back to make sure he was fallowing her.

-x-x-x-

Finally she stopped and leaned against the wall, out of breath. Her feet would hate her for weeks for running in sodding heels.

Fenris stopped beside her, leaning up on the wall. It was silent except for the sound of their breathing. In the dim light Emily's eyes glimmered and shined like actual gold, they seemed to be made of the stuff. He thought she was truly beautiful, yet he had not told her.

"Hawke, I wanted to tell you, and I have yet t get the chance, but I think the dress is very beautiful on you, it suits you well." he complimented. Her cheeks turned pink.

"Thank you, this was a dress my mother made for me before she..." Emily trailed off. "but yes, thank you." there were a few more moments of silence, he hadn't meant to make her think of her mother, it was a horrible subject for her.

"You know," she finally said. "Mother wanted to get me married off to somebody with a title, who was known. But I always told her that I had somebody in mind, that I would marry him or nobody, because I only cared for him. In the end, she finally stopped and decided to let me choose."

"If you do not mind me asking, who is this man?" Fenris asked her. Emily smirked and looked at him, leaning up and giving him a kiss.

"Who do you think, Fen?" she whispered. "Maybe it's the wine talking, but I know who I are for and who has stolen my heart. Let others try, no matter what they do, you will always have it."

He put a hand under her chin to lift her face. She was truly beautiful. He used his other hand and locked it with hers then kissed her.

"Maybe it is the wine talking, Hawke, but you have done that same to me." he told her. They were both drunk, but the words the truth. They kissed again, in silence.


	9. Danarius

**Bring on act 3! Time to die, Danarius...**

**Varania now plays a bigger part in the quest 'Alone' and afterwards. And Emily will finally be reunited with her longest crush and know the truth! But it doesn't end with that, oh no, I mean, there has to be aftermath for her and Fenris, right? It's no fun if there isn't!**

**Please read, enjoy and review...**

-x-x-x-

Varric and Isabela met Emily in Fenris in the Hanged Man, she knew something was up, and she would need the extra firepower.

Her eyes flickered across the room, resting on a young elven woman with dark red hair and a green dress. It couldn't be, no...

"It really is you" she said, looking up at them.

"Varania," he said. It was her! But Varania was his sister, but would that mean...it couldn't be true, there was no way! "I remember you, we played in the master's courtyard while mother worked. You always called me-"

"Leto, yes, that is your name." she cut him off and stood. Emily's jaw fell open a bit, it was Varania, and Fenris was Leto, but...no, how could she not have seen this before? She felt even more foolish. But now, she could help but to wonder if he remembered all those years back when they were young.

"What's wrong? Why are you so-" this time Emily interrupted him. It was clear as day now, it was a trap. But maybe now she could finally see Danarius killed.

"We have to get out of here now, Fenris!"

"Ah, my little Fenris, predictable like always." a voice rang out. A magister walked down the stairs, the stair Emily usually used to get to Varric's private room in the tavern when she went to speak with him, and the magister, she knew, was Danarius, flanked by guards, well slavers was a better word for them.

"You led him here!" Fenris accused his sister. Varania looked at her feet, unable to reply to him.

"Now now, your sister only did what any good imperial citizen should, Fenris." Danarius responded.

"I never wanted these markings, but I won't let you kill me to get them!" the elven warrior snapped but the magister laughed.

"How little you know, my pet." Danarius paused. "And this is your new mistress? The Champion of Kirkwall? I believe it was Emily Hawke, yes?"

"I am Emily Hawke," she said simply. "And I am the Champion of Kirkwall. You know what you are? You are a dead magister, and Fenris is a free man, he belongs to no one!" she added with a hiss, tone full to the brim of venom.

"Do I detect jealousy in your tone?" Danarius asked. "He is quite a...skilled lad, isn't he?"

"Shut your mouth, Danarius!" Fenris snarled, his skin tinting blue, hand already on his sword. Emily felt her hands spark, she could set the magister on fire, and shoe could do it right now. She heard Varric load Bianca and Isabela unsheath her daggers.

"The word is master." Danarius said, signaling for the slavers to attack. Emily sent a fireball hurtling their way then set ice spikes to hit the incoming shades behind her, soon using spirit bolt and making it hurl lightning at a Rage Demon. Danarius had gotten away from the fray, but was attacking from afar, up the stars from what she could tell. Varania hid behind the bar, cowering.

Isabela was focused on Shades, Varric was focused on slavers, Fenris cut through both and headed for Danarius but the magister teleported. Emily turned and saw him behind her, she cut one of her wrists and used her magic, yes she used blood magic, but only when needed more then anything. The magister was sent to his knees and she healed the wound quickly so nobody would see what she was, she had kept it secret from others.

The Hanged Man was littered with Shades and Slavers, soon even a magister.

Fenris advanced on Danarius while he was down, picking him up by the robes he wore.

"You are no longer my mater!" Fenris spat, blood exploded from Danarius as Fenris let the body fall, his hand holding a heart like with Hadriana. Again he crushed it and tossed the remains aside.

Varania had come out of hiding but she held her hands in front of her In defense as Fenris advanced on her next. Emily still held her staff tense in her hand, she still could not wrap her head around this.

"I am sorry, Leto." she apologized. "I...he would have made me his apprentice, I would have been a magister."

"So you sell out your brother ton become a magister?" he snapped. Emily was shocked but stayed silent, nothing was how she remembered, sure people changed but just how much? Varania had been a sweet, selfless girl who loved her brother and admired him like no other when they first met, but now, she had sold him out for her gain.

"I had no choice!" Varania told him, her voice load but faltering. She was scared, it was obvious.

"You did have a choice!" Fenris argued, raising a hand to kill her. Varania backed up into a corner and her pinned her there, she couldn't get away.

"Meserre Hawke! Please, don't let him kill me! Please!" she called to Emily.

"Fenris, do not kill her." the apostate told him. "Because when I first met you both, you were protective of her, she admired you, her big brother. I am not saying things should go back to that, not at all is that what I mean, but don't kill her because she is your sister. I watched my sister die, and I know I would have stopped it if I could, if I had been faster I could have." she continued. "And I watched my brother walk out on me, we never agreed on many things but it broke me, do not kill her, only because she is a victim like you are, because she is the only sister you have!"

"Fine," Fenris lowered his arm but his skin was still tinted blue, though it faded after a moment. "Go, now!" he told Varania, moving to let her through. She ran off but turned.

"You said you didn't want this, did not ask for it, but you wanted it, you even competed for it. When you won, you used the boon to have mother and I freed. I look at you now and think you got the better end of the bargain." she told him before turning her attention to Emily. "Messere Hawke, I thank you once again, Maker watch over you...and you, brother." with that final word, she ran off and out of the Hanged Man.

"I thought rediscovering my past would bring some kind of sense of belonging, but no, it did not, I was wrong. Magic has spoiled that as well, there is nothing, not one thing, for me to reclaim. I am alone." Fenris sighed, averting his eyes from Emily's direction.

"I am here, Fenris." she told him, the words were true, and she hoped he knew that. He looked at her with a slight smile, his moss green eyes full of pain. He looked away from her.

"You heard what Varania said, that I wanted these markings, that I fought for them. I feel so...unclean, like magic is more then just etched into my skin but has also stained my soul." there was a pause before he continued. "Let us go, I need to get out of here." and with that, he left. Emily looked to Varric and Isabela.

"Go get him, big girl." Isabela said, crossing her arms over her breasts. "After what happened, I think him talking to you is best." Varric gave a nod.

"Ravaini is right, go. I'll explain this mess. Bar fight with a mage, the made summoned spirits to help him and they were killed. The slavers, well, they were just a part of the fight and killed. Or a wizard did it like Blondie has said." he shrugged. Emily blinked before turning to leave the tavern.

"Oh! A dragon!" she heard Isabela gasp. "A dragon did it!"

"Ravaini, I like the way you think." Varric chuckled. The door of the Hanged Man shut with a soft slam and Emily headed for Hightown, she knew where he would be.

-x-x-x-

Emily knocked on Fenris' mansion door, there was no answer but the door opened with a creak. Her pace was quick but silent, her staff didn't hit the floor with a tap every time she took a step like usual. She moved quickly up the stairs and into the room where he normally stayed.

She nodded a greeting to have him return it then took a seat near him after putting her staff up against the wall.

"Yes, I am free, Danarius is dead. But, it doesn't feel like the way it should." he muttered. "I thought that if I did not need to run, and to fight, to stay alive, I would be able to live as a free man does. But how is that? My sister is gone and I have nothing, not even an enemy."

"That just means there's nothing holding you back now." Emily pointed out.

"An interesting thought. It is just difficult to overlook what magic has done to my life. If I seem bitter now, it's not without a cause." he paused before continuing. "Perhaps it is time to move on. I just don't know where that leads. Do you?"

"Wherever it leads to, I hope it means we'll stay together." she said, but as soon as she did she relized she may not get the response she wanted to hear, yet, maybe she would.

"That is my hope as well." he agreed, slightly smiling at her. "We've never discussed what happened that night, the one three years ago."

"You didn't want to talk about it." it had broken her when he left, but now, she would get an answer, she remembered how much she worried her mother and her friends when she had locked herself in the room for days, not coming out and drinking herself near death with wine and other liquor she had in the room. And how Orana had pushed food under the door for her, knowing it was no use to try to open the door.

"I felt like a fool then, I thought better if you hated me." Fenris stood up, unable to sit for a moment longer. "That night, I remember your touch as if it were yesterday. I should have asked your forgiveness long ago. I hope you can forgive me now, Hawke."

"I need to understand why you left, Fenris." she replied, she was curious and it was a need-to-know thing for her.

"I've thought about the answer to that a thousand times and more. The pain and the memories it brought up...it was too much, I was a coward, a fool. And if I could go back, I would stay, I would tell you how I felt."

"What would you have said?" Emily asked.

"Nothing could be worse then the thought of living without you." he told her.

"Fenris, I...and nothing is worse then the thought of living without you, not again." she managed, trying to not cry at the sweet words.

"If there is a future to be had, then I will walk into it gladly at your side." Fenris said. Emily got up, her lips twisting into a sweet smile. They kissed and Fenris placed a hand on her head while holding her close.

They both pulled away from one another but Fenris still hugged her close, she laid her head on his shoulder, thoughts rushing through her mind, her heart beating hard, almost thumping in her chest. It was silent then she raised her head.

"Fenris, do you remember? That week I was in Tevinter and we met when we were twelve." she asked, blinking. She wanted to know if he did or not, maybe bits he did and others he did not, but she had to know.

"I remember some, a few things are not as clear. But I do remember thoughts I had. I thought about you everyday since that day you left. Also think of how kind and caring you were, and how much I loved you. You taught me how to read, and how to write, showed me tricks with things and protected against Hadriana when she beat slaves. You also showed me how to live, how to be happy even in the darkest times. At the time, I thought you were the best person there was to walk the world, and how lucky I had been to meet you. I still think that." he responded.

"Thanks. I thought of you everyday as well, you know. And my promise to free you, Varania and your mother. Fenris, I am sorry for not keeping my word,? I should have, just know I never forgot." the apostate paused. "I...just know this; I loved you then and I love you now."

"And I you, Hawke." he agreed. She shook her head.

"Emily." she corrected with a smirk. Fenris sighed slightly and slightly laughed. In a moment they were kissing again and it was silent.


	10. Varania

**Okay, I was thinking, and with Varania only visiting, she could not have come to Kirkwall with a lot, and she wouldn't have a place to stay. So I had an idea; what if he stayed with Hawke? Now it would cause problems with Fenris, with Varania being his sister, however maybe they would get along better at some point if they had the chance to talk and explain and all.**

**Anyhow, please read, enjoy and review...**

-x-x-x-

Emily pushed open the door to her estate, stepping inside and putting her staff in the corner near the door. She had spent the night at Fenris' mansion and figured she should get back. It had been a nice nice, more then nice, it had been amazing in the least.

"Welcome home, messere." Bodahn greeted her as she walked in, passing him. Another letter was dropped off while you were away, it is on your desk like always." he added. She nodded and headed for the desk, picking up the envelope. The apostate opened it and took out the letter, unfolding it to begin reading it...

_Messere Emily Hawke,_

_Maybe it is wrong that I write you, maybe it is not, but either way, I feel like I must. I do not know why, maybe it is because I knew you before, maybe it is because you saved my life again, no matter the reason, I am writing to you._

_In that tavern, the Hanged Man, when I saw you, it felt like seeing an old friend again, I suppose it was too, remembering what happened when I was only seven years old and you were twelve, how you would come play with me in the garden and protect me from punishments and sneak me extra food. I remember that week well, I will never forget it. You were kind then, and you still are._

_I want to thank you, for saving my life, as well as everything those past years. I know my brother is not happy with me, and he has the right to be upset and angry, I wish it were like old times when we got along and we're together and would play, in a way, it seemed like happier times. _

_If you would, tell him I am sorry, that nothing will make what I did right. That I wish for nothing more then for us to get along like before and hopefully one day we can get along again, and we could talk, straighten things out between us, because I would like that._

_And if you do not mind me saying, I saw the way you look at him and he at you. You care for one another, now and all those years ago. After you left, he seemed lost, never quite the same. I remember he once looked at me and told me this: "'Rania, we'll be free, I know it. We just have too be patient, I was promised that, and I trust the person who made that promise to no end." And the look in his gaze, it says he cares, he loves. If I am right, and I know I am, I hope you two are happy, you both deserve that much._

_Finally, I say thank you once more and take care. If you wish to speak with me, I will be in Lowtown for the next week. I'd like to tell you a few things in person, but you do not have to come. I know we are not all ate our best and that you may have more important things to do, "Champion". But you decide, come or not, do as you wish. However, if you do end up coming, I request you do not bring my brother._

_-Varania_

Emily folded the letter and tucked it in her robes. It was only early morning, so if she got going now she could be in Lowtown by late morning about and find Varania about noon depending. She grabbed her staff, opening the door again.

"I'll be back later, Bodahn." she called as she shut the door and headed for Lowtown.

-x-x-x-

"Where in Lowtown is she?" Emily muttered. "Wait...of course! The Hanged Man!"

The apostate headed for the tavern, her pace speeding up as soon as she saw the door. She reached out and pushed the heavy wooden door open, the odor of ale and other liquor stung her nose instantly, or the stench of piss and vomit as she called it.

She headed in, looking around. The elf wasn't in the main room and bar, so she must've had a room for the week she was going to stay.

"So then Hawke freezes the dragon with a simple spell and sends Fenris and Isabela forward to attack and I shoot arrows from afar with Bianca. The high dragon shatters into many sparkling ice and flesh pieces. Afterwards..." she heard Varric say. Emily walked over to him with a sigh.

"Hawke then turns and sets the magister on fire, turns to heal Isabela then spins and freezes the magister to let Fenris get the final blow. In a single move...um, maybe we can continue this later." the dwarf suggested, noticing Hawke. The crowd walked off one by one and Varric took a seat.

"What do you need, Goldie?" he asked.

"You remember Fenris' sister?" Emily questioned, also taking a seat. Varric signaled for Norah, a serving girl that worked at the Hanged Man, to bring them both some drinks.

"Yes. Varania, wasn't it? She seemed...scared. Of what, that's hard to tell, could have been many things." he mused. Norah came over with two glasses of ale and Emily took her own with a smile and a nod of thanks.

"I know. Now, to the thing I need to know; she sent me a letter, and told me she would be in Lowtown is I wanted to speak with her at all. So, I figured where better then the Hanged Man." she paused and took a drink of her ale. "I need to know if she really is and what room if she is."

"She is here from what I know, and I'm not wrong, am I?" he took a sip of his own drink. "I remember Norah showing her to a room and she spoke with Corff." he continued. "Room seven nine five, I believe."

"Thanks Varric." Emily said, getting up. "It's just...important that I see her." she paused. "Also feel free to continue your story and say what you wish."

"It's no problem, Goldie, just buy me a pint." Varric joked with a broad grin. Emily finished her ale and set the glass down.

"Alright, deal." she laughed and headed for the stairs she used when she went to speak with Varric in his room her had in the tavern, to find room seven nine five and the elf within.

Emily turned down a hallway and went to the end, above tthe final door, read the numbers seven nine five in bold black writing, but it was faded from age and the paint was chipping away off the old wood. She stepped toward it and reached for the door knob.

The room door slid open with ease and Emily peeked in. On the bed in the room sat Varania, the elf was writing on a book which paper was held to that she wrote on. Her hand was moving quickly as she wrote but she paused and sighed before continuing, with a few muttered curses that Emily understood were Tevinter curses that she knew well.

"Hello, Varania." Emily greeted, opening the door wider. Varania jumped of the bed, book, papers and pen falling to the ground as her hands sparked with magic. She sighed again and blinked, the sparks fading.

"Messere Hawke, I'm sorry, you just scared me." the elven mage apologized. Emily entered the room completely and closed the door before bending to pick up the fallen items.

"It's my fault, I am sorry for scaring you." she replied, handing the items back too their owner. "Anyhow, I came. I have a few reasons, one being I know what you have to say is important and the other your still a friend even if it's been so many years we have not talked."

"I am glad you came," Varania said, taking her things. "I did not think you would consider us friends, however. Through everything that has happened, I mean since my brother got the boon to free our mother and myself, and when I meet you in the tavern, I thought everything would be different, my relationship with my brother is already different as you know."

"Yes," the apostate agreed taking a seat on the bed and Varania sat next to her. "It is, I remember how much different he was then, but I understand why because of the markings." she paused. "I think what he did is admirable, so much pain shifted to him to free the people he cared for most at the time."

"You think he cared for me and our mother most?" Varania asked her. "No, he did until you came, but then you showed up and everything changed. The masters worked us harder, they punished us more because there were slaves you changed. You changed their views, changed their life, and it brought more work and more suffering. But through it, all of them made it, I got a lot of it myself, but I got through it, my mother and brother got quite a bit as well."

"Really? I have never changed much until I came to Kirkwall, but a whole household..." Emily trailed off. It was silent for a few moments.

"It's true. And that's what I wanted to tell you, I did not feel right to put that in words on paper, I thought better to say it. Thank you, for coming for talking, for...for everything." she thanked, smiling at Emily who smiled back.

"Varania, I hope everything goes well for you where ever you are going." Emily told her, getting up. Varania got to her feet.

"I'm...trying to find a place in Kirkwall but it is proving to be hard when being an elf. I found they had a spare room here and spent the rest of my coin getting it for a week, I figured I would be able to find a place to stay in that time." she admitted.

"Well then, how about you stay with me?" Emily offered. "There's plenty of room in my estate if you want to stay. I have a room out of the way from most the house, if you want it. I offer that one because your brother is going to be my estate often."

"You would let me?" the elf gasped. Emily nodded.

"I would, so how about it?" it was silent after Emily asked her, the only sound the hum of noise from the rest of the tavern.

"I would appreciate that, and I will repay you as soon as I get some coin, I could pay rent to you or something. You've helped me once again, messere Hawke!" Varania told her with a bow. Emily gave her a hug and then took a step back.

"It is no problem, and you do not have to pay me, it's what I do, I help people. Now, gather your things, I'll pay the room fee and we can go to my estate. But, Varania, do me, and yourself, a favor. With Fenris coming to my estate often, avoid him and stay away until I can get things worked out. I would rather nothing happen to either of you." Emily warned.

"I will stay back." Varania promised before beginning to gather her things. Emily watched and noticed there was not much that she had. Maybe four dresses, a pen, two books and the paper. Then an amulet and a ring that must've been her mother's or something to important to sell for coin.

When Varania was done she and Emily headed for the door, Emily carrying the bag of the elf's belongings. Now hopefully she could patch things up a bit between Fenris and Varania, if not, then sodding blighted shit.


	11. Final Fight

**The final fight is here! This chapter is short, because it is only the before battle with a bit of Emily's thoughts and plans, thhen of course the romance between her and Fenris before the fight, because you can't not have some kind of romance before a fight where one or both people in the couple might die, it's just unknown to not to!**

**Had Emily side with the mages, however where is the option to just murder Meredith and Orsino early on and then flee the city and avoid the whole thing? It's not there? Damn it, because they are both bat-shit crazy! Well, they both die anyway, so...but I still think they are insane (the bad kind of insane, I mean, since there is a good kind of insane...I think) well Meredith is just...the whole idol thing, that stupid idol is not worth as much as you think, makes you go crazy, and when you add crazy to crazy, well, it's not good. As for Orsino, he basically helped kill Leandra, he knew of Quntin and did NOTHING about him, I mean, WTF? Really?**

**Anyhow, enough ranting of Meredith and Orsino. Those two just rub me the wrong way, you know? I wish they would both just shut the hell up and get along.**

**By the way, last note; the series will continue on a little bit after they flee Kirkwall. I have decided it will make an good add on or a good sequel, so I will do so. It will show of how the companions got driven away and what happened to Hawke and Fenris. And then Orana and Varania, might find a way to tie in Sandal and Bodahn too, just because I can. So this may be the ending fight, and it might be the end of being in Kirkwall, but there is no way this is the end of this story/seires (story if I add it to this story, series if I just make it a sequel instead)**

**With that, please read, enjoy and review...**

-x-x-x-

"Here I am about to protect these mages in hopeless battle. You lead me to strange places, Emily." Fenris chuckled.

"I'll take you to stranger." she assured teasingly. The final fight was close, she could feel it. The air cracked with tension, with fear as well as hate. People were bound to die, but...not her own, her companions would live, she would make sure of it, only mages and templars would fall, if Meredith and Orsino did too, so be it, she only cared for her friends' safety.

"I know." he paused. "I may not get the chance to say this again...meeting you was the most important thing that ever happened to me, both times as a slave and and seven years back. Promise me you won't die, I can't bear the thought of living without you, Emily, I just can't." he told her, reaching a hand up and cupping her cheek.

"I don't make that promise unless you do, Fenris, because I cannot bear any similar thought." she responded. It was the truth, and she couldn't think of it. It was hard enough leaving Tevinter when she was twelve, and it was difficult when he left her that night, but if he was gone forever, she didn't know what she would do.

"Then I make that promise," he told her, kissing her. He held her close and she pulled him closer to her. In that moment, it seemed nothing could tear them apart, not again. For once it actually seemed peaceful, even though the biggest battle was minutes away, but between happiness and love, it just seemed so.

Both leaned away at one moment and Emily smiled sweetly at him. Her golden eyes softened but still held their glimmer in what dim light there was. He could look at her eyes for hours, he loved the color and how they looked like melted gold in the glittering sun.

"Emily," he whispered her name and gave her another quick kiss. "It's a beautiful name for a beautiful woman." he complemented. Her cheeks flushed red at the compliment, it's something she remembered him saying when she kept having to correct him when they were twelve. She was never mistress or messere or serah to him then, she had made sure of that, and now it was not Hawke or Champion, simply her name, Emily, and she loved when he said it, hell, she loved to just listen to him talk.

"After this is all over, well we will have to flee the city, no doubt in that, but we can all celebrate. How about it?" she suggested. It was the best way to celebrate, she she knew after this they would all have to flee Kirkwall. The city of chains had already started to crumble and it would be gone at some point the way it was going. After the final fight, she would head for her estate, she would make sure to get anything she needed and have her companions do the same. Then she would have Sandal and Bodahn leave, make sure they got to Orlais. But after that, she would make sure Varania and Orana were ready to move with them, she wouldn't leave the two elves, and she wouldn't leave her mabari, Lynx, because nobody gets left behind, not anyone.

"That sounds perfect." he agreed.

"I will even make sure there is much wine involved. However, it hasn't even started yet, and the sooner it begins, the sooner it ends, yes?" Emily said. She hated to admit they had to go, she didn't want the happiness to fade, but there would be more to come in the future.

"Yes," he nodded his agreement once more.

"Then let us get started. Until the end, my love." she vowed, reaching out an arm, a smile twisted on her lips. Neither of them would die, she would make sure of it, neither of them and none of her companions, her friends.

"Until the end, my love." he repeated, taking a grip of her forearm, she did the same. They shook and she gave a nod before he let go of her arm and she his. Emily turned and went to speak with Orsino, it was time to begin, it was time to give back to Meredith what she had deserved for years, a death beyond any other.


End file.
